By: Steve Trubilla
Live and let live, an approach to life that if applied without prejudice carries with it the harmony most seek.
This should not mean you must accept what your good common sense tells you is wrong or unreasonable.
If you ask a friend or neighbor how they feel about the concept of live and let live, I am confident you will hear they subscribe to it.
Even the youngest of children know it is wrong to expect to get their own way all of the time or have another suffer for their gain.
That is, of course, if the children have been given a moral compass.
Absent the compass, the natural law of fairness is broken. If one does not believe their desire for things and what they will do to get them is governed by limits of their conduct, the tenants of live and let live are violated.
When someone is treated unfairly, the predictable expectation is that it will not go unaddressed. It is not unreasonable to expect those that lie, cheat, and or steal be held accountable.
Rationalizing the unfairness by making excuses for it does little, if anything, to address the injustice. When this is done the person treated unfairly is again victimized.
Predictably, when this happens, matters become the subject of unresolved conflict.
In a perfect world, the very idea that people would be allowed to benefit at the expense of others would not be tolerated. We, of course, do not live in a perfect world, and it is tolerated. We do not like it, but yes we do tolerate it. Often you are left with little choice.
Here are a few examples of what I am talking about. Let’s see if you can relate to them. I am sure you can think of many others.
You have some property that you rent and find a tenant decides they will not pay. Then they destroy the place. Yes, over time you can get them out and even take them to court.
At the end of it all you may obtain a judgment you can never collect on. The person just moves on and does it to someone else.
You buy a car from someone that tells you everything is fine, even get a warranty, then find out there is something wrong that they clearly knew about. Like with the renter, you can avail yourself of the courts, but the end result is the same.
You hire someone to do home repairs only to find they, in spite of references, and assurances, had no idea what they were doing. You find yourself left with a mess to clean up.
The three examples I have given are things done routinely. Authorities I have talked to say proving any of them are criminal is very hard. They are civil matters. When this happens, you can hire a lawyer, spend all kind of money, wait, often for years, and then only end up with a fist full of receipts.
Live and let live is, I feel, is a prudent way to approach life and a way to avoid conflict. On the other hand just accepting injustice is not applying this philosophy, it actually violates it.
Sometimes you simply have to stand up for yourself, and what is right, even if you lose.
Businesses, politicians, and others that do these kinds of things will never change, no matter what you do, to or for them.
They will try different stories, re-invent themselves, blame you or others, and excuse every manner of thing in an attempt to justify what they do.
Most of this can be reduced to one thing. They did not do what they said they were going to do. When you take away all of the fluff, they lied to you. If they took money from you for it, then they are a thief.
If from the outset they are not going to honor what they said, then they have demonstrated they have no integrity and do not even understand the concept of it.
The simple truth is there are scoundrels out there that do not even think like you do; they feed off others.
Sometimes the best you can do once they are exposed is to avoid them, and tell those you value to do the same.
To me, the worst of these are those that prey on the elderly, and or use charities to mask their schemes.
Yes, it would be much better if our legal system served up what they deserve, or if they could be marked with a scarlet letter, but that is not the system we have.
So live and let live, but be cautious of those that would live off of you.